Dang Tran Ha Linh

"You see, don't you, that she's got to be killed?" "Appointment with death" - Agatha Christie

There was something I wanted from that family. A bit of joy . A bit of care . A bit of attention . I stepped foot inside the house. Then, just like that, I wanted to stay.  Without my belongings, I stayed at their house for longer than I expected. It was his rage , and the trash bag of clothes . It was my crying one night , and the crowd. It was a silly affirmation of a boy's behaviour , and her startle . There was not a time I could shake my head off of those memories, or any others. Or, could I?

This heatwave can give me delirium. I'm about to lose humanity. A fit of rage may come any second now.

In love with you but I'm so sad. So in love but I'm so dead.

Highly doubt my ability to keep anything alive. A small creature as vulnerable as you are. I am so sorry . . .

I miss those ridiculous excursions back in secondary school . I miss those classmates I used to hate so much. I miss every heartbeat when there were oral tests right in front of the whole class. I miss one hundred thousand million times we said goodbye, but we would talk a bit more, so the call would last longer. I miss the freedom you would always give me when I ran away from my parents . I miss the rebel childhood when I would cry every other day for the sake of my own choice. I miss the wind on my face and the fresh air I breathed in my lungs, even though the air pollution was the worst of the year. I miss the worst of the people who couldn't understand me and would rather criticise me than see the bright side of the shit I had done. I miss the street food so motherfucking much. Gosh, I miss my country .